Sharpton called out Dean on the lack of Blacks and Hispanics in his cabinet during his 12 years as governor, and Dean had to admit that the charge was true. Just as true as was former President Bill Clinton's lack of minorities in his inner cabinet.

Dean and his handlers sought to downplay the impact of Sharpton's words the following day with Dean using the standard white liberal quote, "Some of my best friends are black." With Dean's words ringing my ears, my thoughts lead me to wonder if I should start a new business called "Some of my best friends are black."

This service would allow a white liberal with a questionable past (like Howard Dean, Robert Byrd and others) to come in, pick thru my stock of blacks and buy a new best black friend. This in turn would allow them to label their opponents as racist for not having a black best friend as well.

I would have the best products available: liberal, sellout, victim, token, prop, sock-puppet, angry, step-and-fetching, hip hop and jive talking blacks would be in stock and out the door for all my liberal white customers. Just think of all the business from Capitol Hill and Georgetown alone.

The white liberals in question could then host parties in their homes and show off their new black friends to all their envious liberal friends.

If the white liberals in question are into politics, then they can hold news conferences with their new best black friend standing behind them for all their photo-ops and quickly become the talk of the town's political circle.

If the liberal in question is like Howard Dean, who happens to be running for the presidency, I would also use the Congressional Caucus, Rainbow/Push and NAACP Blacks, who would then give them shining endorsements without any questions and without any illusions about money, power and influence.

I would corner the market on "liberal white guilt" within a week. "Every white liberal has a best black friend and now you can too" -- when you buy from "Some of my best friends are black" -- would be my sale's pitch.

Once they had finished taking their "best black friends" for granted, they could either return them to our "used section," or simply throw them away, and then come in for new models as needed.

Sharpton for his part should be commended for exposing the real Howard Dean to America. But the Congressional Black Democrat Caucus should be condemned for simply handing out their endorsements to a man, who as governor really had a serious and genuine need for "affirmative action" in his own cabinet.

The sad reality of the matter is that most of the black community will back Howard Dean without question if he happens to become the Democrat Nominee for President, despite his track record as governor. Brings to my mind another former governor who became "our first black president" named Bill Clinton.

When Sharpton is done with his Presidential run, perhaps he would like to become a business partner with me. We could set up our first shop on Martin Luther King Avenue in D.C., so we could force liberal whites to come to the ghetto and reinforce their "guilt trip" over all their failed social and economic programs that were supposed to have helped minorities. Sharpton and I could have shops in Hollywood and every major Northern City, like New York and Boston. We could employ millions of blacks and give a huge boost to inner city economies within 6 months.

No I am not crazy, I would make this work because like Don King said "Only in America."

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Kevin L. Martin is an Advisor and Member of Project 21. He has served as the former Government and Political Affairs Director to the African American Republicans Leadership Council. He has appeared as a political commentator on FOX News.
View a photo of Mr. Martin.

More Op Eds by Kevin L. Martin

Posted by Douglas Oliver on January 16, 2004 at 11:50 AM